This is Part 1 of a 9 Part Series "I Am Not Defined By My Weight" inspired by Rachel Hollis' book "Girl, wash your face".
Part I - Intro
Just recently, I finished reading Rachel Hollis’s new book “Girl, Wash Your Face” and I loved every freaking word in it. I loved it so much, it prompted me to write about my experiences with some of the chapters.
The premise of the book is for women to stop believing the lies about who they are, so they can become who they were meant to be. Rachel goes through 20 lies that women believe and one big important truth—"You, and only you, are ultimately responsible for who you become and how happy you are"(pg. xi).
I loved the book so much, I dedicated an entire post for why you MUST read it, but for now, I want to tell you how deeply moved I was with lie #17 - "I am Defined by My Weight".
In this fitness series titled "I am Not Defined by My Weight", I will tell you my journey with weight-loss, weight-gain, and self-worth.
The first post will focus on my childhood years. These were the years where growing up in a hispanic household truly molded the way I saw physical appearance, breeding an obsession with the perfect weight and body.
Then, I'll take you through the dreaded high school years and eventually, college years where I promise it gets a little more juicy. I actually cringe writing about most of these stories, feeling the embarrassment come right back. In spite of that, I have to tell you my story. Because all of those individual moments slowly molded and shaped the woman I am today.
I will continue on and take you through the struggles in ROTC where I had to constantly tell people I was too fat to wear my uniform (and yes, it was tramatic).
Thankfully, I persevered through those challenging years, but the struggle did not end there. I eventually got married and had to learn how to grocery shop for two people with competing food/fitness goals (and an ice cream addict...ahem David).
Do you make your spouse suffer so you aren't tempted to eat an entire bag of Salt N Vinegar chips?
Do you buy them donuts for breakfast even though you know you will OBSESS over them until the entire box is gone?
I had to learn and am still learning what that looks like.
As if my self-worth wasn't already in shambles, I became pregnant at the heaviest weight I had ever been. Any momma reading this will understand the struggle of postpartum body image and self-worth. I will open my heart to you so you can hopefully understand the woman behind these words.
Spoiler alert—I will not end it by telling you I have figured out the success to loving your body. I will not end it by telling you I have it all figured out. I don’t even know how I will end the series to be completely honest. But I will be open, honest and vulnerable with anyone who wants to listen/read. These stories might not seem like a big deal when you read them, but to me, they had a huge impact on the mother, wife and woman I have become.
My only hope is that I can encourage women to know they are not alone in the struggle and maybe in writing, I can find healing.